sunnuntaina, joulukuuta 31, 2006

I would like to extend thanks to Zen Wizard for having mis-diagnosed me as lactose intolerant. His mis-diagnosis led to a brief no-cheese crisis in which Lady Bonds suffered profoundly, but has now joyously resumed her normal consumption of curdled milk and mold.

Despite the unlimited quantities of New York Extra Sharp Cheddar Cheese at my disposal at the moment, I look forward to my imminent return to The Land of Camembert and Brebis.

Residency in either country presents its difficulties (which are far too complex to be addressed in a New Year’s Eve post). However, to all those who, after reading assorted accounts of the “Year in Review” and, after pausing in considered reflection on the decisions and actions of their homelands, have decided that seeking alternative citizenship might be a simple way to shed national responsibility/guilt/shame, I offer the following suggestions:

Become Sort Of Canadian.

Or, Become a Scottish Lord. "Why?" you may ask.

"People with a title are seen as wealthier, more attractive and much more successful than a plain Mr, Miss or Mrs. This will boost your self-esteem and increase your confidence."

If anyone knows how I could become Sort Of Finnish, please let me know. I would consider renouncing my ladyship.

torstaina, joulukuuta 14, 2006

Welcome to Lady Bonds' Sunday Picnic.

Please bring wine and cheese; more wine and cheese will be provided.

The weather will also be provided.

Bread, too, would be nice to have. To go with the cheese.